Oh God where art thou?

I had a discussion yesterday night with a good friend who had been fighting her own self from all the anger, disappointments and loneliness in her life. I found her very calm, quiet and serene. She told me she found Jesus again.

I don’t know how to do that.

I lost him somewhere along the way. Along the very harsh, rude, devastating life’s path. I was never a very strong believer but I did believe in God. I lost him too. I don’t believe in any higher being preaching for love and peace. But I should. It’s very cold in me. I fight to stay the good person that I am. i fight to keep that girl in me a passionate, tender, caring, loving and peaceful girl.

Where did I lose you? When exactly? I miss having you around to blame and to thank. To adore beyond any understanding. I miss believing you exist unconditionally. How do I go back? I have read so many books that said you did not exist. I have witnessed so much evil proving you don’t. Where are you now? The world needs you. We need an army of angels to fight the evil that is roaming our world. Hunger, famine, wars, richness of the riches, poorness of the poors, greed, crime, addiction, lust, pedophily, slavery… and the list goes on. People stopped believing. My friend told me that the virgin mary said the world needs an army, an army of believers and an army of prayers to fight today’s evil. I want to believe that. I want this epic movie to start and Joan of Arc to lead an army and fight back the evil occupation. Where do I enlist? There’s an army occupying countries’ riches, another one acquiring a land that is not his, a third one using chemical weapons to wipe out his own people, a plane vanishing off the face of the earth, more than 500 people sentenced to death in one trial, Bombings, killings, rapings…

Please God send your angels to enlist the very few good men left that live by your wisdom, to train them and lead them into combat. Evil is winning and it’s winning ground fast. there is no room for good anymore. there are no more good intentions left in people. If you do exist you need to come now. You sent your son and your prophets back in the days. I think you need to send the whole battalion now. send them on horses or unicorns, on chariots of wheels or of fire, send them with wings or or send your archeries. just send them now. They did it back in the days of the elves and the dwarfs. They defended Middle Earth and saved it from sauron. We can do it as well. I am sure we can.  All we need are the avengers, Gandalf, the elves, the autobots, definitely the spartans, the spy kids, wonderwoman, superman, spiderman, batman, all Marvel’s men, all the students and teachers of hogwarts and whatever is left of the humans who are still humans…

Please God come back and lead this battle. We are losing and we are losing big time.

For Mother’s day

Mothers day is coming up, it’s march twenty first

I beg of you do not forget my flower and my gift

promise me you won’t forget my kiss and my hug

my “I love you momie dearest, you are my pride

you are my strength, my power and my fist

without you my soul would go lost and adrift

i am more meaningless than the stupidest bug

unless you stand beside and call me my bride”

I would hug you with all my heart, my soul and my being

make sure my arms would hold on tight to my two human being

the two humans i have given birth to and grown into children 

 of whom I shall never let go and never get tired of the burden

i shall never let go and i shall always protect, love and cherish

these two beings that call me momie until the day I perish

Do not forget Mothers day my beautiful kids, I beg of thee

So I know that this journey was well deserved and all so worthy